I don't think i could have chosen two harder things to give up, i feel like death right now., And coming up to the end of day two i made the decision to quit my bitchin' and just set out and do it.
I've spent so much time procrastinating and now that my weight (or lack of) no longer holds me back i can do this. I can do whatever the frick i want.
I gave up Chocolate for a little bit, i gave up lollies for a little bit, i gave up coffee for a little bit.
I want to be making and eating my own meals again, so i will. And i am. And dandy!
Also waving goodbye to the Facebook.
Not for along, but living in this house means i must give up some things. And some of those things are things we want. or think we need.
I had a wonderful moment the other day, sitting on a wooden bridge dangling my footsies over the edge into the closed mouth river with birds singing, and cherry blossom stretched wide above my head. Delicious.
Look how many I's again. Fail. So i've decided to go home. Not because i feel like i have to. Not because my housemate not because of anything. But i feel it's the right thing to do right now. I go with gut feelings and my gut tells me.. i need to be at home right now. I'm going to continue paying mum and dad rent but with no extra expenses. I just hate feeling responsible for screwing S over. She is an amazing girl and has made moving out the best ever. but i was not her ideal roomie. She is never home, and i fucking hate it. I can't stand being alone. It's when i'm alone i am at my very worst. I want to have someone to cook for, someone to hang with.
it stinks.
I'm going to the gym.
Because i feel fat. And i hate that.
Less care, careless.
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